Features

The Herbert Holla

Herbert's Hot NYC Picks
wed(21): pangea - herbert - hiphop/r&b/reggae/80s/rock
wed(21): cielo - louie vega/kevin hedge - soulful house
wed(21): apt - dj koga/dj freedom chicken - soul/afrobeat/old school/funk/classics
wed(21): angel bar - scratch famous/teflon - reggae
wed(21): brower park/bk - arrested development live - 7pm
wed(21): crotona park/bx - sugar hill gang/kid capri - 7pm
wed(21): bob - rholi rho/5th platoon - hiphop/r&b/reggae/80s
wed(21): shelter - kayo/tyrone francis - house music all night long say word
wed(21): marquee - stretch armstrong - hiphop/rock/80s/old school
wed(21): pravda - dj obah - afrobeat/soul/funk/old school
wed(21): hiro - lord finesse/diamond d/mark the 45 king/eli - hiphop/rock/80s
wed(21): lotus - ani quinn - hiphop/r&b/80s/rock
wed(21): suede - frank delour - hiphop/r&b/rock/80s/house
wed(21): joe's pub - dj eleven/ant marshall/danny castro - hiphop/soul
wed(21): forbidden city - neil armstrong/spin dynasty - soul/funk/rock/80s/hiphop
wed(21): lotus lounge - dj sims/rez/southpaw - soul/hiphop - bethesda stand up!!
wed(21): aubette - qool marv - soul/funk/r&b/old school/house/afro/world
wed(21): afterwork/rumor - snatch 1/m.o.s./self/kaos - hiphop/r&b/reggae/classics

thu(22): show - herbert - hiphop/r&b/reggae/80s/rock
thu(22): guernica - blessed/selly/reborn/monica pineda - soul/funk/house/hiphop
thu(22): table 50 - q tip on the set - hiphop/rock/soul/funk/classics
thu(22): suite 16 - sussone - hiphop/r&b/reggae/classics
thu(22): ruby falls - big guest djs - hiphop/r&b/rock/80s
thu(22): joe's pub - guest djs - hiphop/r&b/reggae/classics
thu(22): gallery - sure shot - hiphop/r&b/reggae/80s
thu(22): suede - ani - hiphop/r&b/reggae/80s/rock
thu(22): b3/basement - dj alex/live brazilian music - 9pm
thu(22): flat - dj mono - hiphop/r&b/reggae/classics/80s
thu(22): coral room - jessie saunders/chip e/darshan jesrani - house music
thu(22): apt - language/duane/lindsey - old school/black 80s/electrofunk/breaks
thu(22): 323 lounge - eli/tom mello/big hot guests - house/hiphop/soul
thu(22): quo - crooked - funky house/top 40 hiphop/80s/rock
thu(22): odea - qool marv - soul/funk/r&b/old school/house/afro/world
thu(22): afterwork/alibi - kool dj red alert!! - hiphop/r&b/reggae/soul - 7pm
thu(22): afterwork/kanvas - dj sweets - hiphop/70s/80s - 6pm
thu(22): afterwork/strata - goldfinger/snatch one - hiphop/r&b/reggae/classics - 6
thu(22): afterwork/manhatta - dj eleven/moma - soul/hiphop/classics

fri(23): starfoods - thank god it's freedom - the illest - see gigs below!
fri(23): frying pan - nickodemus/mariano/bruce tantum - house
fri(23): ruby falls - mark ronson - hiphop/r&b/reggae/80s/rock
fri(23): lot 61 - dj soul - hiphop/r&b/reggae/classics
fri(23): pangea - m.o.s./suss-one - hiphop/r&b/reggae/classics - black diamonds
fri(23): union square lounge - marlon d - deep house
fri(23): ruby lounge - dj ola - hiphop/funk/reggae/classics/80s/r&b
fri(23): negril village/rhum lounge - obah - soul/hiphop/funk
fri(23): spirit - shawn ink/big ben/lucho - ktu house/hiphop/r&b/reggae/latin
fri(23): canal room - frank delour - hiphop/r&b/rock/80s/house
fri(23): shanghai rock hotel/20 w. 39th st - kristin mainhart/kromozomes - 9pm
fri(23): copacabana - power 105's dj kut - hiphop/r&b/reggae/classics
fri(23): flow - jo jo flores/john davis/guests - house music, son
fri(23): vela - dj reach - hiphop/r&b/rock/80s/reggae
fri(23): table 50 - dj language - soul/classic hiphop/breaks/funk/classics/house
fri(23): roxy - goldfinger - hiphop/r&b/reggae/classics
fri(23): quo - disciple/omi - house/hiphop/r&b/reggae
fri(23): open air - evil d/butta l/lord sear/mr. walt - hiphop/soul/reggae/80s
fri(23): lion's den - smif n' wessun (cocoa brovaz)/boot camp clik - midnight
fri(23): madame x - jon oliver - soul/indie hiphop/funk/b-sides/cool sh&t
fri(23): afterwork/sequoia's - willie rodriguez/john sciascia - hiphop/r&b/latin
fri(23): afterwork/ellie lounge - daddy dre/kevin lyttle! - hiphop/r&b/reggae
fri(23): show - crooked - top 40 hiphop/reggae/80s/house

sat(24): social club - herbert/slynkee/cel - hiphop/r&b/reggae/rock/80s/house
sat(24): rehab - cosi - hiphop/r&b/reggae/classics
sat(24): ruby falls - dj soul - hiphop/rock
sat(24): central park summerstage - carl hancock rux/ndea davenport/imani izuri
sat(24): mission - stormin normin - hiphop/r&b/reggae/classics
sat(24): 40/40 - rahlo/k.o. - hiphop/r&b/reggae/classics/80s
sat(24): coral room - sureshot - hiphop/r&b/80s/rock
sat(24): shelter - timmy regisford/ambrosia project live - house!
sat(24): chetty red - van vader/guests - hiphop/r&b/reggae/classics/old school/80s
sat(24): sapphire lounge - jazzy nice - hiphop/soul/old school/funk/breaks/house
sat(24): etoile - goldfinger/precise - hiphop/r&b/reggae/classics
sat(24): table 50 - questlove from the roots/dj wool - hiphop/soul/rock/80s
sat(24): queen of hearts - jean claude the funky pirate/big ben - house/hiphop
sat(24): cocktail room - reborn - soul/funk/hiphop/neosoul/classics - 7pm
sat(24): capitale - kulcha/ev/showcase bashment - hiphop/r&b/reggae/classics/soca
sat(24): vela - omi - hiphop/house/80s/rock
sat(24): strata - ody rock - hiphop/r&b/reggae/rock
sat(24): pm - crooked - hiphop/80s/rock/disco/house/reggae
sat(24): deep - self - hiphop/r&b/reggae/classics
sat(24): porch bar - eric rodriguez/steve martin - salsa/merengue/reggae/soul/funk
sat(24): military park/newark - eric sermon/tony touch/black moon/masta ace - 1pm
sat(24): 10 jay st/dumbo/bk - big 12 hr bash - http://www.destinationnewnation.com

sun(25): fez uptown - marc smooth/guests - rare groove/soul/hiphop/reggae/classics
sun(25): joe's pub - evil d/lord sear/butta l/rocksteady!!!! - classics/old school
sun(25): lotus - stretch armstrong/guests - hiphop/80s/r&b/rock/old school
sun(25): tribeca grand - j-rocc/rich medina/kon + amir - hiphop/soul/funk
sun(25): deep - camillo - hiphop/r&b/reggae/latin/80s
sun(25): lq - snatch "shlomo" one - hiphop/r&b/reggae/classics
sun(25): 14 verona st/bk - rooftop bbq, kids!!!! - food - beer - music - what!!!
sun(25): cage/nj - lou gorbea - house music
sun(25): pianos - queen majest/jd/scratch famous - reggae/reggae/reggae
sun(25): crobar - rocksteady day party - tony touch/black sheep/freedy fox - 3pm

mon(26): apt - cucumber slice - soul/funk/rare grooves/latin/uprock/old school
mon(26): cielo - francois k - future dub/space vibes/abstract grooves (aka house)
mon(26): crobar - mada/moody/big live rock acts - hiphop/rock/house
mon(26): lq - prince tribute party - guest djs - live performances - cee lo!!!!

tue(27): joe's pub - guest djs/live performances - soul/funk/classics/hiphop
tue(27): open air - jlayne/elijah/guests - rare grooves/70s/80s/old school/house
tue(27): sapphire lounge - eman/lola - house/deep grooves
tue(27): the park - dj stu bronze - rock - free bbq from 10 to 11:30
tue(27): belmont lounge - qool marv - soul/funk/r&b/old school/house/afro/world
tue(27): table 50 - swamy/john creamer/david vasquez/dope guests - house
tue(27): mission - d-nice/dj hud/mc frank jugga - hiphop/r&b/reggae/classics
tue(27): lobby - will/self - hiphop/r&b/reggae/classics
tue(27): afterwork/aubette - snatch 1 - hiphop/r&b/reggae/soul/classics - 6:30pm
tue(27): afterwork/ida mae - kaos - r&b/classics/neo soul/hiphop - 6pm

Herbert's Heard
"You Dropped a Bomb on Me" -- Gap Band
"The Real Thing" -- Sergio Mendes (written by Stevie Wonder)
"Love Honey, Love Heartache" -- Mann Friday
"Ballad of Dorothy Parker" -- Prince
"You Saved Me" -- R. Kelly

Word As Bond
Why, Jada??? I'll tell you why! Because you are getting old. That's right. Not old as in "tired," or "overdone" like "Milkshake," but old as in ... years. Like the rest of us. And like the rest of us, we're watching value and worth scoot aside to make room for pop trinkets, rhinestones and shimmer. We've all come to love and cherish underlying beauty and meaning, but, well, the kids haven't yet, man! Don't forget, we were young, too. Once, we were weekend warriors with MTV videos in our hearts and high school crushes on our minds. But now, we're all grown up!! I know, I know. It's awful, but true. Hip-hop is grown up, technically. Hence the reason we gave the world the jiggy era: We dun growned up and got ourselves a job. We also inevitably introduced all those kids to this money-fostered fantasy crap way too early.

You too, house music heads! You guys are really grown up! All the new, worthy house music sounds like a Sunday afternoon in your living room in Jersey, the time when the sun throws itself around the wall over your couch in one last over-emotional protest of having to leave. You make it sound as if all of House music itself is going "bye-bye."

Don't lose hope! Stay in love! Laugh and jump! Keep the faith! I know Herbert has begun a new relationship with G-d himself, and it's all because of R. Kelly's latest song "You Saved Me." Yes, he did. R. Kelly saved Herbert from the bowels of disbelief. Hallelujah! Praised be thy name! I'm Jewish, but I'll shout it out loud like 5 pews on Sunday morning when I hear that song. Praised be thy name!!!

Thank you, G-d, for my Freedom. Cuz it be the best fu**in' party in the whole damn entire city, motherfu**ers!!!! (Repent! Repent!) Freedom last week was crazy mad funky. Now hear this: The only reasons you will not get into Freedom is because either a) you are drunk, angry, screwfaced or rude, or b) we are at maximum capacity and cannot fit anyone else into the space. warning: you must come before 1am if you want to avoid waiting on line. If you fall under the first category, well, luckily we haven't really had any of y'all, but if you fall under the first category, go the fu** home (more penance!). We are not about profiling, acting rude, having attitude, starting problems, thinking you are the sh** (five lashes this evening) because you paid too much for your Club Monaco or Prada or wherever you shop.

You see, Herbert doesn't give a damn about fashion, and doesn't keep up with the trends (never really did, except when checkerboard painter hats with tails were all the rage). I get all I know from Foxy, Lil' Kim and Jay-Z talking about their latest shopping fits. But since we're all broke now and watching our pennies and suffering the economy, we don't rap about it anymore. Now all we do is talk about sex. When we're poor, it's sex, violence and gripe. When we're rich, it's fashion, liquor and new dances like the Harlem Shake.

Now let's move into the food category. With Herbert, it's always about food.

I had a great meal at Blue Smoke off Park Avenue with my homeboy Pesci, the man behind the scenes you hear me mention from time to time (he doesn't like it when I talk about him, so I'll stop there). It was "great" because it was free and because of the company. But the food? Ahh ... go to Virgil's. Much better. And on the other side of things, I had a ... I really didn't have a meal at Popeye's. I stuck my spork into the chicken breast and it bled. It bled. It did. I think I may have heard it scream and say "How could you?" (I decided to drop the weapon and put my hands in the air.) The side biscuit almost made up for it, so crispy and buttery, but, well, there was only one biscuit.

Nothing like Chester Fried. Or Roscoe's. G-d how I miss Roscoe's. Please G-d, with all of your infinite strength and wisdom, please send me back to Roscoe's soon. I am a true believer, L-rd, I have been faithful for quite some time (at least since last week when I heard R. Kelly's new song), and I know your reward the true and good.

Peace, love, good will to all mankind, good health, and Roscoe's,


Herbert's Gigs
wednesday - the rich bi*ch party - pangea - (417 lafayette)
nyc's hottest weekly at one of nyc's most exclusive clubs!!
10pm to 4am - hiphop/r&b/reggae/80s/old school/rock - $15
look sharp (models, bottles, etc.) - rsvp djherbert@earthlink.net

thursday - club show (135 w. 41st b/w 6th + 7th)
nyc's craziest, livest long-running weekly party!!!
10pm to 4am - hiphop/r&b/reggae/80s/old school/rock - $15
look sharp - live dirty dancers - rsvp djherbert@earthlink.net

this saturday - social club (14 e. 27th st b/w 5th + madison)
the hot hot hot new saturday weekly - no more Lot 61!!!
special performance by Akon doing the smash hit "locked up"
big birthday celebration for playboy playmate stephanie adams!
hiphop/r&b/reggae/80s/rock/house/classics by herbert - main floor
a mix of the same sort of music downstairs by slynkee and cel
look sharp - exclusive - $15 - rsvp djherbert@earthlink.net

every friday - freedom - starfoods (64 e. 1st b/w 1st+2nd aves)
#1 funnest friday night dance party in nyc, son-n-n-n!
classic hiphop/soul/dancehall/80s/house/classic r&b/funk
$6 peach punch - food till 2am - dancing - come as you are!!
$5 on my list - warning: come b4 1am! - rsvp djherbert@earthlink.net

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DJ Herbert

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